


Left Unsaid

by NeverForgetStarkiller



Series: Gingerpilot Holiday 2018 [6]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Christmas Party, Getting Back Together, Gingerpilot, Happy Ending, Hux has issues with feelings, M/M, Post-Break Up, it's complicated - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-31
Updated: 2018-12-31
Packaged: 2019-09-30 23:00:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,738
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17232761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeverForgetStarkiller/pseuds/NeverForgetStarkiller
Summary: Day 6: Winter Sweet Treats and ApparelPoe has a secret. And, it's that he's not okay. He hasn't seen Hux since the redhead walked right out of Poe's life three months ago. This Christmas party could change that.





	Left Unsaid

No one told Poe that _he_ would be here. Poe didn’t know.

 

No one ever told Hux anything. He didn’t even know what sort of party it was they were hosting until people started dragging in wreaths and lights and asking where to hang the mistletoe.

Now, the place was filled with people. And, there was Armitage Hux, walking out of the kitchen, alone. And, there was Poe Dameron, passing under the mistletoe next to someone Hux didn’t know.

Hux’s jaw locked tight as he looked away, hiding any flash of emotion with the drink in his hand. He turned back toward the kitchen. Rose Tico ran in front of him with Finn in tow, laughing about something. Their laughter ended the second both noticed Hux at the sink. Some part of him wanted to look up, pretend to be fine, scold them for running through his house. He didn’t do that. Instead, he ran water in the sink and washed the few dishes that had gathered there already. Finn and Rose grabbed drinks and snuck back out of the kitchen, thinking they’d avoided him.

He didn’t want to talk to Poe Dameron’s friends. He didn’t want anything to do with them at all. That suited them fine, he was sure. They’d never liked him in the first place.

Perhaps no one ever had.

Hux shut off the sink and got himself another drink of water. It wasn’t the holiday punch, or the eggnog, or the hot chocolate, each of which sounded awful to him. He didn’t like sweet things. So, why had he liked Poe Dameron?

 

“Merry Christmas,” said Kare. She tackled Poe in a hug.  

Poe smiled. “Hey, Kare.” He nodded toward Snap, who was walking up behind her. “Snap.”

“Poe,” Snap said. “Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas,” said Poe. “Now, get your wife off before she scares someone cute away.”

“Didn’t realize a holiday hookup was in your agenda,” Kare said, releasing Poe. She smirked. “But, just in case, I did bring my big, yellow sign that says, ‘Poe’s Interested’ with your phone number on the back.”

“Not sure that will be necessary,” said Poe. “I appreciate the offer, though.” Snap looked at Poe with a smile on his face, but his eyes held something else. Doubt. Poe tried to give him a reassuring look, but Snap shook his head. 

“We were going to get drinks,” said Snap. “Do you need one?” _Or, do you need to talk?_

“No,” said Poe. “Thanks, buddy, but I’m good.”

Kare shrugged and shot a meaningful glance at her husband. “I’ve got two hands. I can get two drinks on my own if you two want to find a good spot for us to scope out the party.”

Poe forced a grin. “Great.” He took a deep breath and tried, “The place seems nice.” Kare walked away.

Snap crossed his arms, blocking the big Christmas tree on his sweater from sight. “You look bad, Poe.”

“Thanks, man, that’s what everyone wants to hear.”

“I mean it,” Snap said. “I thought you were getting better.”

“Better? I’ve never been better.” Poe glanced around the room at all the strangers. “I’m doing fine, Snap.”

“Have you talked to him?”

There was a reason Snap was the one person who knew. He was always open and honest, and he knew more about the world than anyone else in Poe’s life. It hadn’t seemed like a bad idea to open up to Snap at the time. At the time, in fact, Poe thought telling Snap would just be practice for when he’d one day tell everyone else. He hadn’t imagined that there would come a point when there was nothing left to tell.

Poe swallowed, and his throat felt dry. He should have gone for that drink. “He doesn’t pick up when I call.” He shook his head and stared off, away from Snap. “Hasn’t ever, even once. Not even to tell me to stop calling.”

“I’m sorry, Poe.”

“Hey, it’s not your fault. Don’t worry. I’ll be fine; it’s me, remember?”

“It’s okay to not be okay, sometimes,” Snap said.

“Thanks,” said Poe, but he didn’t want to talk about it with Snap. What was he supposed to say? Keep lying to try to make Snap feel better? Or, tell him the truth? He wasn’t into bringing other people down. That was what Hux did. And, damn, if he didn’t do it well. “I just don’t have anything to say.”

“Really?” asked Snap. “Nothing? What were you bothering to call him for, then?”

“I don’t know,” said Poe. He took a deep breath. “I don’t know. I had things to say to him. When I was upset or angry, alone on my way home from work or in my room at three in the morning with just BB around. He never picked up, and I wasn’t calling to talk to his voicemail. I don’t even know what I would have said if he’d answered.” Poe rubbed the back of his neck. “That he was just as terrible as people said, maybe. That I was wrong about him, maybe.” He sighed. “That I was sorry, probably. And, I didn’t mean any of it, and nothing had to change, ever… So, it’s probably better he never picked up.”

“Maybe it was for the better,” said Snap. “You know what you want, Poe, and the two of you wanted different things.”

“What was it like for you when Kare ended things?” At that, Snap frowned. His arms fell to his sides. Poe said, “I know it was bad. But, I couldn’t imagine it myself, then.”

“That was different, Poe,” said Snap.

Kare walked to them, eggnog in one hand, punch in the other. “They even have hot chocolate,” she said. “Kaydel and Dopheld sure know how to plan a party. And, the kitchen is gorgeous. I’d live here.”

Snap looked at his wife and shook his head as if trying to forget that they ever had broken up. “We’d never afford this place if we saved every penny we made our whole lives.”

“You know, I think I am going to go get a drink,” said Poe.

“Hot chocolate,” said Kare.

Poe smiled and walked off, leaving them there. He glanced back to make sure they were talking, then headed away from the kitchen, toward the side door. Outside, it smelled like tobacco and winter, and Poe hated that his first thought was, _Hux._ Poe nodded at some fellow partygoers, including Dopheld and Kaydel. Kaydel tried to wave him over to talk, but Poe pretended he didn’t see the gesture.

He walked out into the backyard. The house, if a building this size could still be called a house, was beautiful. How Kaydel found it was beyond Poe, and he hoped she hadn’t spent a ton of money to rent it out for a party.

Poe found a spot on the patio of the poolhouse and sat down, letting his legs rest for a minute. He leaned back and pulled his phone out of his pocket. A text from Kare saying, “ _We’re here._ ” Two from Finn: “ _Here. Where are you?” “Never mind. Found you.”_ A missed call from Rey that he guessed would have been about the same conversation. He’d seen Rey and Ben a while ago, so he swiped the notifications away, then his thumb lingered over the screen.

_Don’t do it._

He pulled up his texts to Hux. Hux always liked texting. He preferred it over calling. Poe always joked how it was impersonal, and nothing could beat just chatting on the phone. Now, Poe had foggy memories of hundreds of phone calls. And, the sole, solid evidence of his time with Hux were sporadic texts that were, more or less, just arranging times to meet. Poe wished that once or twice he’d texted to have a conversation instead of called. Then he at least wouldn’t feel like he was the crazy one. Looking at these messages, it looked like Hux was right. There was nothing there, nothing meaningful.

Poe knew better.

 

“Hux,” said Ren. Hux didn’t quite hide the scowl that came every time he heard that voice.

“Ren,” he answered.

“Tell Rey that this is your house.” He was standing with that brunette girl. Dameron’s friend.

“I didn’t say it wasn’t his house,” said Rey. “I was just saying that no one could live here all the time.”

Hux glanced at her. “What?”

Rey touched the back of her neck. “I just mean it’s cold. You can tell when houses are lived in. They feel different. Warmer. Like a home.”

“House and home both mean the same thing, Rey,” said Ren.

“They _don’t_ mean the same thing, Ben. Not really.”

Hux watched in silence as Ren smiled – not smirked, s _miled_ – and said, “If you say so.”

Rey nodded at Hux like she was about to walk off, then paused and asked, “Have you seen Finn or Poe?”

“No,” said Hux because he wasn’t about to say he’d seen Finn and Rose walk through the kitchen earlier when they thought he hadn’t noticed. And, he wasn’t going to say he saw Poe Dameron lurking beneath some mistletoe.

Rey nodded then glanced at him, narrowing her eyes. Hux thought she might ask something else, but Ren said, “Let’s go,” and they left. Rey was an odd girl. Hux didn’t know much about her. He’d avoided that whole crowd of people for years -- everyone except Dameron. Now, things were as they should be, and he could avoid all of them. They’d even taken in Kylo Ren, so that was one less person Hux had to concern himself with. In truth, with Phasma gone, there was no one left for him to concern himself with. He was free to focus on more important things. Work.

In his pocket, Hux’s phone vibrated. He took it out and hoped that it was someone from work.

 _“Merry Christmas Eve, Hux.”_ Poe Dameron.

Hux glanced around as if the man who’d sent the message might appear from the shadows. Dameron hadn’t seen him earlier. Hux was sure of it. Besides… It was a party. Why would he be texting Hux now of all times? The kitchen didn’t feel so safe anymore.

Hux moved out, staying close to the wall as he watched for that frock of dark hair in the crowd.

For now, the living area was free of  Dameron. Hux walked through and up the stairs, avoiding some strangers making out in the middle of the staircase. He made his way to the third floor, then down the hallway to his room, unlocked the door, then locked it again behind himself.

Had Hux known Dameron was going to be here, he would’ve avoided the party altogether. This would have to do. He walked to the window and looked out at the lawn. Shadows danced through the lights – other people, other strangers, celebrating the holiday.

 

“Poe!” shouted Finn from across the grass. Poe looked up from his phone. It wasn’t just Finn. He was with Rose and Rey and Ben.

“Hi, Poe,” said Rey. Ben loomed over her shoulder, quiet.

“Hey, guys,” Poe said with a grin.

“What are you doing out here by yourself?”

Poe shrugged. “Clearing my head for a minute.” That was a blatant lie. His head was swarming with thoughts. On Christmas Eve last year, the party wasn’t quite so big. No strangers or Ben Solo. Just friends and hot chocolate and old Christmas movies. When Poe left, it was to go see Hux, and they’d met back at Poe’s apartment. Hux had sidestepped the “no gifts” rule by giving Poe a watch that wasn’t wrapped; he’d called it a host gift because it was polite to bring a gift to someone who’d invited you into his home. Poe had feigned being miffed then given Hux the black and steel-grey scarf he’d bought for him. Hux had never worn that scarf. And, Poe hadn’t worn the watch until it was something he could hold onto for the memory.

Finn gave Rose a dark look, and she stepped forward like they’d rehearsed the next bit, “Snap said we might want to check on you.”

 _Damn it, Snap._ “Check on me? Not sure I’m what any kidnappers out there are looking for.”

“Yeah, but the house could be haunted,” said Rose. Finn glanced at Rey, and the spark of panic between them said that this was not in their pre-rehearsed script.

Ben nodded. “Could be. Hux’s dad died on the property.”

Poe froze. Because of the mention of Hux’s name, because of what Ben had said, and because _how_ could that be true? “What?”

“He was… Sick. Died in his bed a few years ago,” said Ben. “So, it could be haunted.”

“That’s awful,” Rey said.

 _His bed?_ Poe stared at the back of the house. “This is Hux’s dad’s house?”

“It’s the estate,” Ben said. “Like everything else, it’s Hux’s, now.”

This place? Poe studied the building, now. An enormous Victorian masterpiece. He could see it, now. Could imagine a little Hux in a prep school uniform, decorating a tree in the foyer. _No, watching servants decorate the tree_ , thought Poe. It would have been one of those big trees with color-coordinated ornaments, all silver and gold, with nothing sentimental or cute.

“Huh,” said Poe. “Haven’t seen Hugs around.”

“We saw him earlier,” said Rey.

“We snuck around him in the kitchen, like, an hour ago,” said Rose.

Poe’s heart leapt to his throat. Hux was here. “Where?”

“The kitchen,” both women answered.

“Great.” Poe stood. “I need a drink, anyway.”

“He won’t still be there,” said Ben.

It was already frequent that Poe got the urge to punch Ben Solo in his still-working-on-being-a-good-person face. The last thing he wanted to hear was Ben talk about Hux. As if he didn’t hate Hux, as if Hux didn’t hate him, as if he wasn’t terrified of him. More than that, he hated that Ben knew anything about Hux that Poe didn’t. As if Hux had been closer to this man he hated than he’d ever been to Poe. Poe held his fists at his sides. He focused on his own breath.

“Now that he knows I’m here, he’ll run off to hide.” Ben kept talking, oblivious to Poe. “Not like he wants to spend time with anyone here, anyway. Hux hates the holidays.”

 _Why?_ Poe wanted to ask, but he didn’t want to hear it from Ben. Rey asked, though, and Poe loved her a little for it.

“I don’t know. He hates joy,” Ben said. His voice grew quiet, timid as Rey looked at him. “And, I… Enjoyed tormenting him more during the holidays. It made me feel better.”

“At least that’s one non-innocent person you tortured,” said Finn.

Before it could devolve into yet another fight about Ben’s past, Poe asked, “Where could he hide?”

“His room,” Ben said.

“Are you going to look for him?” asked Rey. “We’ll come, too.”

“No, that’s-“

“At least we outnumber him,” said Rose. “That’ll wipe that cocky smirk off his stupid face.”

“We’re not going to jump him,” Rey said. She glanced at Ben. “Right?”

Poe didn’t have a good reason for them not to go. Not without telling them everything, and he couldn’t handle that. They all went. Poe texted Hux, _“I’m coming to find you.”_

Going for the garage would be a risky move, thought Hux. Dameron _knew_. And, Poe Dameron had so many friends. Someone would see Hux leave. He was trapped. His best hope was that Dameron gave up after opening a few doors. There were enough rooms in the house that anyone would lose hope after a while.

Hux’s heart hammered against his ribs until they ached. _What if Dameron does come here?_ Hux hated the thought. Hated that they hadn’t spoken in months and that every time Dameron called Hux just stared at the phone, and every time, he almost answered right before Dameron hung up. He’d almost called back, once.

He’d almost texted back tonight.

“Hux,” called Kylo Ren through the bedroom door.

 _Not now._ “Leave,” said Hux.

 

Poe’s stomach clenched. He hadn’t heard Hux’s voice in so long he’d almost convinced himself he didn’t miss it. Poe pushed Ben out of the way and knocked on the door. “Hugs, it’s me. I want to talk.” He’d thought about what he was going to say the whole walk – and it had turned out to be a hell of a walk: _three flights of stairs_ – to Hux’s room.

All of what he’d planned to say went out the window the second Hux opened the door. Poe had been prepared to explain that it was a poorly-timed joke, that he hadn’t meant it, that this was ridiculous, and that he was sorry.

It wasn’t a joke. He had meant it. It wasn’t ridiculous, and he wasn’t sorry: he _loved_ the tall, icy-eyed redhead standing right in front of him. He’d meant it, then, and he felt it, now, strong enough that he might burst if he didn’t say it. So, he kept his mouth shut and didn’t say anything.  

Rose tilted her head, watching Poe, and Hux fixed his eyes on Ben. No one said a word.

“You’re missing the party,” Rose said after a full minute of silence. She couldn’t quite make it sound like she cared, but it was at least a polite thing to say.

“I saw who was at the party,” Hux said. “It doesn’t seem a loss.”

“Yeah, okay, that’s enough of that,” said Finn. “Can we go?”

Rey glanced from Ben to Hux, then to Poe. Ben said, “You look pale.” Rey elbowed him in the gut, and Ben shot a look in her direction. She stared back at him, calm and determined. Ben wasn’t going to apologize to Hux, though. Not for that comment, or for any of the things Kylo Ren had ever done to him. Ben… Didn’t think he was there yet. Not for Hux.

When Ben didn’t speak again, Rey took over. “Poe was worried about you.”

Hux avoided looking at Poe. “As you can see, I’m fine.” He did look fine. He was clean-shaven, hair as perfect as ever. His shirt was pale grey and wrinkle-free as though it had been ironed _after_ he put it on, and, though he didn’t look festive, he looked about how anyone could have expected. The same as always. “I have been fine,” he said.

 _Without you,_ Poe added, hearing the words as if Hux had spoken them aloud. Poe moved a hand up to smooth his own hair back. “Can I come in?” he asked.

Finn and Rose glanced at Poe. Hux looked like he might prefer to say no, but he didn’t. He stepped to the side. It was more than Poe had hoped for; he walked in. The others lingered and looked at each other, not sure what to do.

“It’ll just be a minute, guys,” said Poe. He moved a hand to the doorknob where Hux’s cold hand rested. Hux didn’t withdraw or stop Poe from shutting the door. He stood still. Once it was shut, Poe left his fingers where they were, resting atop Hux’s. He waited for the redhead to draw back first. “Hey,” he breathed.

His voice seemed to be the trigger. As the word came out, Hux’s hand pulled away and Hux turned, stalking across the room. It was a room Poe had never seen in his life, but it felt like a place Poe already knew. Steel -grey walls. Minimal furniture, all of which was solid and black. No bookcase, no stuffed animals, nothing that suggested Hux had ever had an ounce of sentimentality or nostalgia.

“I didn’t know this was your house,” Poe said.

“I didn’t realize you would be here. I would have left,” said Hux.

“ _I_ still would’ve come, if _I’d_ known. Can I ask?”

Hux settled with his back to Poe, looking out the window. “Ask?”

“Why did…” Poe shook his head. “I get that I crossed the line. I just want to know why we couldn’t talk.”

“There was nothing more to say,” Hux answered. “You made sure of that.” He tensed.

“Maybe I read things wrong,” said Poe. “But I thought things had changed a while back.” Poe leaned against the foot of the bed. “You know, we used to call just to set up a time to meet. That changed. I don’t know when, but it did. Last November? When you called and raged about everything wrong Kylo Ren had ever done, and we were on the phone for an hour before I asked if you wanted me to cancel my plans with Jess? You did, and I canceled so you could come over.”

Hux’s shoulders went rigid.

“I already knew it, then,” Poe said. “I just didn’t say anything.”

“You didn’t have to say anything. Ever. You shouldn’t have.”

“Seems like it,” said Poe. “I did, though. Because it was true. It had been true for almost a year. And, you know, I wouldn’t have said it at all if I wasn’t so confident you felt the same way.”

“Then you aren’t as good at reading people as you like to think.”

“And you? That’s supposed to be a talent of yours? I was in love with you for a _year_ and you didn’t notice until I said something.”

“Of course, I _noticed_ ,” Hux hissed. He turned, facing Poe.

“Why the hell did it scare you so much, then, when I said it?” Poe stood up, meeting Hux’s eyes.

“Nothing scared me.”

“You ran.” Poe took a step forward. “I tried to call you fifty times.”

“That’s what voicemail is for.”

“I didn’t leave one because I wasn’t calling to harass you. I was calling to _talk_ because not talking to you _sucked._ ” Poe frowned. “I thought we were going somewhere. That is was getting ridiculous keeping us a secret, and that I didn’t want to come up with another excuse why I wasn’t interested in dating some guy my friends met who was _so nice_ or _just perfect_. I wanted a future with _you._ ”

“There could have been one,” said Hux.

“How? What did you want? To never talk about our feelings or thoughts but to just one day wake up and both decide to… _Get married_ without talking about it?”

Hux’s jaw clenched as he swallowed back whatever he was about to say.

Poe gaped. “You can’t be serious. People are supposed to talk about things.”

“We weren’t even _dating._ ”

“No, we were just fooling around. For almost every day, for almost two years. While not seeing other people. And, calling each other just to talk all the time.”

“Dameron.”

“I’m sorry,” Poe said. “But, I’m starting to think pissing you off is the one way I can make you feel anything you’re comfortable feeling.”

Hux took a deep breath and worked hard to keep his lips set in place, to keep his face from betraying a bit of what was going on in his mind. “Consider this closure, then. Merry Christmas.”

“I don’t want closure,” said Poe. “I want you.” Poe looked up at him, stepping closer again. Hux’s face changed – not much, but enough for Poe to see. He was used to those micro-expressions. Hux was afraid. _It’s in this house,_ Poe thought. The whole building was cold and lavish. The sole source of cheer came from everything Mitaka and Kaydel had decorated the place with. The Christmas greenery, the twinkling lights, the hundred or so people dancing and talking. Without those things, the house would be hollow. Someplace Hux might have lived with his family long ago except that his family had been just his father and other children his father had taken in. Hux would’ve been raised here, in all the richness of the estate, surrounded by a void of emotion. Poe didn’t know much about Hux’s father, but he knew plenty from seeing the estate. All show and extravagance. Everything in the house was shining of wealth and empty of worth. To Hux, too, Poe bet.

Shara Bey and Kes Dameron had been the best parents Poe could have ever asked for. Their family wasn’t wealthy in any sense, but their house had felt like _home_. This place was a tomb of memories that Hux didn’t care for. It wasn’t his home. It didn’t even seem like a place he liked.  

“I don’t know why you hated hearing that I love you. There’s… A lot I don’t know about you. I get that. Because you’re right. We weren’t dating. But, the past three months have been the worst breakup I’ve ever gone through.” Poe moved a hand – slow, gentle -- to Hux’s shoulder. “Are you happier, now? Without me?”

“I’ve been fine,” Hux said, the way he always avoided questions. Sometimes, he was the most direct person in the world; sometimes, he wasn’t. Most of the time, he wasn’t when the subject was emotion. Once, his whole face had gone red and his eyes had glared daggers into Poe’s soul, and he’d kept insisting he wasn’t angry. He just couldn’t admit to feeling something. Poe had told him that it was annoying as hell. That was still true.

It was Hux, though. It was part of Hux, and it was a habit for a reason. Poe didn’t know if it was something to do with his childhood or what. Whatever it was, people didn’t grow so emotionally stilted without a reason. One day, Poe wanted to see a Hux who didn’t feel the compulsive need to pretend he didn’t feel anything, ever.

For now, Poe took the non-answer for what it was. A defense mechanism. If Hux had been happier, he wouldn’t have cared to sidestep the question because he wouldn’t have been guarding himself.

“I’ve been fine, too,” said Poe. “I was happier this time last year. I was happier a few months ago. I was a lot better with you.”

Hux met his eyes. Said nothing, just searched Poe’s eyes for anything to grasp onto.

Poe reached down into his own pocket. He pulled out a tiny, wrapped box. “I got you a present, in case I saw you sometime. It’s a real present, and this year, it’s not breaking a rule, because I haven’t seen you in months, so we didn’t set a rule. Merry Christmas.”

The box was suspiciously small. Hux’s eyes flitted toward Poe’s neck; the necklace was still there. Hux unwrapped the box and opened it to find what looked a small hunk of steel. Hux touched it and knew in an instant what it was.

“There wasn’t much left after the building was destroyed,” said Poe. “I thought you might’ve been upset at the time. You might not have thought to keep something. That’s the piece of Starkiller I took as a memento. Not that I feel guilty for destroying your evil, corporate superweapon. But, I thought it might mean more to you as a memory than to me as a trophy.”

Hux clasped the remnant of his favorite accomplishment. He closed his fingers around it. Held onto it.

Then someone knocked on the door. “You’re still alive in there, right?” Finn called.

Poe rubbed his eyes and smiled. “Sorry I brought backup. I didn’t know where your room would be.”

“I might not have let you in,” Hux said. “If I thought you wouldn’t have made a scene in front of them.”

“Fair enough. Then I’m glad I brought backup,” Poe said. “Look… Hux, if this is something you don’t want, I get it. I can leave you alone. If you do, though, I am going to need some kind of sign. Like we said, you’re good at reading people, and we both know you aren’t gonna to say what’s on your mind.” Poe took a deep breath and walked for the door.

“Dameron.” Hux waited for Poe to stop. He went to the dresser and from it pulled a laptop bag and, from that, he pulled a neatly-folded shirt Poe hadn’t seen in a while.

“My shirt?” Poe hadn’t missed it. He’d known all along where it had gone. Out the door with Hux, when Hux had gathered himself up and left without hanging around long enough to change clothes. Hux held the shirt out to Poe. From someone else, this would be a sign. A definite sign that it was over. Hux wasn’t like other people. “You kept it?” Poe tried to imagine the stupid brown t-shirt in with the rest of Hux’s no-doubt coordinating, meticulously-organized wardrobe for more than a few days. It would have driven him crazy.

“I washed it. A few times, considering-“

“What we’d been doing? Yeah,” said Poe. He took the shirt and kept his eyes on Hux’s. “Thanks. Do you want to… Do something sometime? Or, pick up the phone when I call? I could text instead, maybe.”

“Perhaps,” said Hux. “Sometime.”

“How about this? If I call and you pick up, we make a plan and call it our first date.”

“Fine,” Hux said.

“Poe?” Finn called again, knocking harder.

“Your… friends are waiting.”

“Just a second,” Poe said, louder, for the people outside. He nodded at Hux. “Yeah. I’ll talk to you later, then. I hope.” He turned away.

Hux let out a breath, letting his body relax for the first time since he’d seen Poe Dameron earlier in the evening. His phone vibrated. Hux raised an eyebrow and took the phone out of his pocket. _Dameron._ He glanced toward the man one more time and answered the phone. “Hello?”

 “Hey.” Poe glanced over his shoulder at Hux a few feet away. "Does tomorrow work? The movie theater’s still open on Christmas Day.”

“Capitalism.”

Poe couldn’t help but grin. “Hey, it’s convenient, sometimes.”

“I won’t be going out tomorrow.”

“Then the day after,” said Poe. He met Hux’s eyes.

“Fine.”

“Can I kiss you?”

“Fine.” Poe smirked and slipped the phone back in his pocket. He crossed the room in three strides and moved his arms up to Hux’s neck, pulling the taller man down so he could reach. Poe kissed him. He’d meant for it to be sweet, but it wasn’t: it was deep and desperate and hot with longing, with joy. Hux grabbed a handful of Poe’s hair, pulling Poe close, his fingers curled together so tight he might never let go.

“Poe!” Finn shouted at the door.

Hux groaned and leaned away, his fingers loosening their hold on Poe’s hair. “You should go.”

“You should come with me,” said Poe. He cupped Hux’s jaw and studied his face. He hadn’t ever forgotten it, not really, but had been afraid he might. Then Poe went to the door, opened it, and smiled. “Hey, guys.”

Rose and Finn glanced from Poe to Hux, decided that whatever had happened was fine as long as no one was hurt, and Rose said, “Are you ready to head back downstairs?”

Finn nodded. “We’re going to get hot chocolate and go look at the stars.”

“That sounds great,” said Poe. “We can all go.” He glanced at Hux and offered his hand. Hux ignored it and stepped out into the hall, walking ahead of the group. Rose’s face fell when she realized Poe was inviting Hux. Ben might have said something, but Rey fixed him with a look he was much more keen to listen to than his instincts.

They swarmed the kitchen, filling mugs and coffee cups with hot chocolate and various marshmallows. Hux opened a cabinet and took out supplies to make himself some tea instead.

“You could add some marshmallows, at least,” said Poe.

“If I wanted to be sick, yes.” Hux steeped the tea leaves in hot water while Rey ate all the marshmallows from Ben’s hot chocolate. Ben let her, acting like he didn’t notice. Then they all went outside to the poolhouse.

“Can I ask why the pool needs its own house?” asked Rey, settling in a pool chair. Ben sat by her feet, and Rose and Finn huddled together by the edge of the pool, leaning against each other for warmth.

“It’s not for the pool,” said Poe. He leaned back in his own pool chair, looking up at the stars. He held his cup of hot cocoa with both hands, enjoying the warmth from the sweet drink.

“No, it was for guests my father didn’t like,” Hux said. He leaned back in his chair, next to Poe’s. “You all would have stayed out here, had you been invited over.”

“All of us?” asked Poe.

Hux set down his cup of tea to turn toward Poe. “Especially you.”

Poe smirked. “Your father wouldn’t have liked me?”

“Not at all,” Hux answered, toneless. He made it sound like it wasn’t a bad thing.

Once again, Poe tried to imagine what sort of childhood Hux had lived in this place. It was something he might find out one day. But, for the first time in three months, Poe didn’t feel like living in the past. He put down his hot chocolate and moved over, pressing his lips to Hux’s.

Hux made a soft sound and closed his eyes. He drew back after a moment. “You taste like chocolate.”

Poe chuckled at the way Hux said it. “For most people that’s not a bad thing.” A moment passed as they watched each other.

Then Rose said, “What,” and Poe remembered that they were all out here, too.

“Oh, we’re dating, now,” he said. Rose and Finn stared at Poe, open-mouthed, unable to manage more than a few grumbles for words.

One of Ben’s eyes twitched as he repeated, “What?” Rey was the one person who didn’t look like her whole worldview had just changed.

Later, Poe resolved to tell them everything. He’d have to call Snap and talk to him, too. Then there was Kare. Jess. Kaydel. Poe laced his fingers together with Hux’s. If every holiday could end with hot drinks, cold nights, and Armitage Hux at his side, Poe would explain the whole, complicated situation to every single person he’d ever met. For now, this was enough. Poe leaned over and kissed Hux again, and, this time, it was sweet, and, though it tasted like chocolate, Hux never wanted it to end.

 

 

 

 


End file.
